This is a closed meeting. It is open only to OA members and anyone who has the desire to stop eating compulsively. Newcomers are welcome!
or www.suffolkoa.org.
This meeting is listed on our website with more contact info. I was not sure who else to send this to in Intergroup, so please pass it on to those involved.
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I recently read an article about AA and they talked about the difference in membership retention compared to years ago. It was sent to me by an OA member.
Many members have asked, “what is happening to OA; why are meetings so much smaller, not growing or closing?” I thought – it’s not that OA is not growing, but because many members are doing online meetings and phone meetings. Times have changed, and OA is trying to make other meeting options available. Our face-to-face meetings are going through changes, and the question is, "Why?"
The article I read was about living in the problem or living in the solution. Are we sharing the solution at our meetings, or just talking about the problems? Are we carrying the OA message of finding a solution in this program, or are we focusing on the food obsession?
If you have any thoughts or opinions about situations or changes that have taken place in OA over the past years, we’d like to hear from you!
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Many OA members have taken part in a birthday or anniversary ceremony during their recovery in OA. This is a celebration of length of abstinence in the program, and is an integral personal part of one’s recovery, as well as something all members should witness at least once while attending OA meetings.
In light of this great accomplishment, it has been suggested that OA introduce a “Validation Ceremony” to the program, which is in essence a celebration of not length of abstinence but length of time attending OA meetings. Some of us never attain “back-to-back abstinence,” yet we continue to persevere in the program. After all, it is only the desire to stop eating compulsively which allows us to take part in the OA recovery program. Shouldn’t we recognize the fact that we may have years of “back-to-back coming back” even though we have been less than perfect in our abstinence?
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Doing What is Right For Me
My husband and I have been married for 32 years, and I have been in OA for 16. Early on in OA, I tried various food plans, found one that worked pretty well and had many binge-free years. However, I kept trying to get away with eating riskier foods and drinking alcohol as well. My husband was delighted when I started drinking with him, but the alcohol often led to overeating. Food binges became more and more frequent until this February.
For Valentine’s Day, I baked my husband a favorite treat and ate compulsively while doing so. The next day I felt remorseful and concerned. We were away on business, and I spent a few hours alone in the hotel room. While praying, I received guidance from God. He wanted me to give up alcohol and return to a food plan I had tried long ago. Doubts came to my mind, but God assured me he would give me the ability.
When I had abandoned that same food plan in the past, my husband had said, “I’m glad you’re not eating that way anymore.” And how would he feel about losing his drinking buddy? For a moment I feared disappointing him, but I am the family cook, and we can still go to our favorite restaurants. I am the one living with this disease 24 hours a day, and I have the right to choose what to put into this body – not to mention the message from God! I did not question doing his will.
That was more than two months ago. I have been abstinent since. It took a few days to gather the courage to tell my husband. As long as I am working the Steps and using the tools, I am confident I can live among others, abstain and become a better person, friend and wife.
I have heard people say, “What other people think of me is none of my business.” I think that applies to my husband as well. I must do God’s will, no matter what. I can be lovingly sensitive to the changes our relationship will go through. In the end, I believe I will become more open, loving and real. What’s not to love? K.K.
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“Continued to Take Personally Inventory and When We Were Wrong, Promptly Admitted It.”
Living Peacefully
I do not always take inventory in the midst of a disturbing situation, so I spend some time at night reviewing my day. Step Ten helps me persevere toward growth.
I have several methods to review my day. Some nights I writer, “I like how I….” and list positive things I did and then follow with, “next time I might….” to imagine how I could improve in the future. Other nights I simply think about how I am doing physically, spiritually and emotionally. If anything comes up that might keep me awake, I write about it and put it in my God can, turning it over to God.
Another way I practice Step Ten is to review the Twelve Step Principles on page 147 of the Twelve Steps and Twelve Traditions of Overeaters Anonymous. They inspire me to grow in all my affairs. Page 85 in the “Twelve and Twelve” states, “As we worked these steps, we learned how much healing and help there is in loving connections with a Power greater than ourselves and with those who share our lives. We now want to continue strengthening these connections, and we have a way to do that through our practice of Step Ten.”
By sharing these difficulties with God and my sponsor and making amends where needed, I live a clean and peaceful life and watch the need to eat compulsively disappear.
K.K. Pottstown, PA
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The next time you attend a meeting and you wonder, “How much should I give?” Remember this – give as if your life depends on it.
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